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Miss Belleanne

Apr 11, 05 - 7:27 AM
Aristasians in America!

This evening I was descended upon by hordes of mushrooms begging for caffeine. I distracted them with presents wrapped in pale blue paper with metallic shimmery butterflies on it, and all was well. Quite a pleasant experience, on the whole, but what a comedy of errors we were made to endure first! Broken telephones, messages going astray, silly hotel girls who wouldn't take messages for people who hadn't checked in yet, a vital turning missing from the directions I gave (whoops)...

Later we went out to forage for thick, rich, steaming chocolate drinks which make brunettes shrink back in distress and blondes say, "May I have some more, please?" On the way back to Belleview, we passed through a key intersection... several times. On our third approach, we got it right, but not until after we took a tiki tour through several completely unrelated neighbourhoods. It really wasn't a good day for navigation. If the blondes in the party hadn't had an extra caramel drink to pass between them, things could have become desperate.

The revels ceased at about half past midnight (many presents, much naughty gossip!) but Miss Drusilla is still here, baking caramel brownies, and I must dash to help her clean up the kitchen! She might be different in real life and at Avendale, but her baking is entirely non-fictional! A longer report tomorrow, I promise, darlings!
Princess Mushroom

Apr 12th, 2005 - 10:55 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

Important meetings always seem to be vigorously opposed by the naughty old Forces of Darkness. When our current Avendale District's main organiser first came to visit she undertook a three-and-a-half-hour journey that ended up taking her seventeen hours. But she arrived in the end and now holds a most important position in the District.

As Miss Belleanne has mentioned, our getting to meet her was dogged by difficulties and problems in communication, but finally we have met and I am pleased to report that I have now spent time with the charming Miss Belleanne in person after knowing her in Elektraspace these many months and have also met Miss Drusilla who, as well as being a character in the fictional Avendale is also very much a brunette in real life; and a most impressive and authoritative brunette at that.

We went to a restaurant in Atlanta which is exteriorly dominated by a giant fish - and when I say giant I mean many times the height of an anthropomushroom. The food there was perfectly sublime and Miss Drusilla headed the table with prefectly aplomb (which made one rather nervous, but only in the nicest way).

Today we all lunched together in the most utterly gorgeous restaurant and this afternoon a bonding ceremony will take place which will enlarge our family.

Aristasia continues to expand in all directions and despite niggling obstructions from the Other Side, we are not only having lots of fun but finding deep and abiding joy in our bonds of friendship, love and commitment to the noblest of ideals.
Miss Belleanne

Apr 13th, 2005 - 4:52 AM
Re: Aristasians in America!

We have had so much fun that the only way I can think of to put it all down for you darlings is to make a list of the best bits.

a) Miss Wardelle and I had a delightful singalong in the front seat of the car yesterday. We are both word-perfect on Don't Let's Be Beastly To The Germans.

b) I gave a certain person a MAC eye shadow called Shroom.

c) Certain people gave me a mouth-wateringly gorgeous three-piece red and black suit, which we all wanted but they only had it in my size.

d) The anthropomushroom added to her collection of Atlanta wildlife a giant talking buffalo head (still less impressive than the giant fish, though).

e) We managed a great deal of successful navigation, completely redeeming ourselves after the other night's multiple botched approaches to that important intersection.

f) White chocolate truffles from Lindt, which Miss Drusilla passes out far too reluctantly!

g) We discussed whether one ought to keep one's gloves on when tackling a hot chocolate in a coffee shop, and someone said "Well, it is charming, but not obligatory," to which one replied, "But surely it is obligatory to be charming?" And we were all charming, even Marguerite.

We shall write a proper report later, in due course, with suitable photographs, but just at the moment my feet are about to fall off from all the exertion and I rather think it is bedtime!
Miss Serena

Apr 13th, 2005 - 8:15 AM
Re: Aristasians in America!

It's all very well, but what's the weather like? (Just kidding.) It sounds perfectly marvellous, both jolly and civilized. Best wishes on the rest of your journey!
Princess Mushroom

Apr 13th, 2005 - 4:41 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

Not such a silly question. The weather seems to alternate between gorgeous sunshine, overcastity (if that is the word I am groping for) and violent storms. I mean really violent storms.

We also saw a talking moose last night. Absolutely really, though I shouldn't blame you if you couldn't tell moose from fiction. Actually every word in this thread is true.
Miss B*X

Apr 13th, 2005 - 11:44 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

.....Oh Gosh! It all sounds marvellous. I am missing you both and am terribly jealous, wishing I was there for chocolate and talking Mooses and bonding with the lovely Miss Belleanne!
Alas! here I am in grotty old Pitsville.....still, if I am very sensible with my pennies, I shall be sending my report from the Land of the Rising sun at the end of the year, and how jolly exciting that shall be! (It now seems I shall also be going on to Australia and New Zealand.....out of necessity rather than choice!)

I shall expect, at the very least, a postcard from the British, Aristasian contingent.....and if I'm REALLY good, perhaps a dinky souvenir.....I can swap it for your travelling gifts which I had not the opportunity to impart!

Do continue to have a wonderful time, and give my regards to Miss Drusilla (Hmm!)

With Much Love,

Miss B*X
Miss Belleanne

Apr 14th, 2005 - 3:30 AM
Re: Aristasians in America!

The original plan was for the Embassy contingent to leave yesterday after luncheon. But really, it was too soon, and they elected to stay another night and leave first thing this morning.

But the Forces of Apparent Darkness (I say apparent because it was rather good luck for me!) threw one more obstacle in everyone's way, and mushrooms came over to play a little more while Sensible Brunette Business went on nearby. Later on, over tea in lovely cups (thank you again, Miss Wardelle!) we discussed lunch and the prevailing opinion was that as we all had to eat something in any case, we ought to have it together.

And then we had to have caramel drinks! (Em concluded that they weren't all bad, making her the first brunette of one's acquaintance who can stand them at all.) And more long talks!

And nobody got onto the road at all until half past six. Odd how these things work out. We concluded that Dea must have wanted us to have an extra day together. And it was a marvellous day, as indeed were the previous ones; there is really nothing in the world more congenial than Aristasian company. Haven't had so much fun in years!
Princess Mushroom

Apr 14th, 2005 - 5:15 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

The Shroom eyeshadow is splendiferostic. I am wearing it today, of course!

I feel quite sure that Dea wanted us to spend the extra day at Belleview, not only with Miss Belleanne and Miss Drusilla but also with my wonderful cousin Isabel who joined us there and is simply my Favourite Blonde Ever.

It has been a curious trip with the forces of Darkness dogging us since that first dreadful night in the hospital before we even flew (the beasts came within an ace of stopping the whole trip). Our extra day at Belleview was owing to another near-disaster. But the devil proposes and Dea disposes; it worked out just as She wanted - of that I feel sure.

Here we are now at Oxford. Not Milchford, but Oxford Alabama, boinging about with an early start because the clocks moved backward as we crossed the Alabama border into a new time-zone. Royal shrooms, known to be a bit delicate, have come down with some sort of infeccer. I say "come down" but that is not correct. We are up and boinging, infeccer and all, and we intend to boing until and unless we collapse.

All the travel and the excitement of meeting our Aristasian family abroad may have weakened us, but there is much to do, both in the line of Aristasian business and pleasure. I never understand people who say one shouldn't mix business with pleasure. I have never been able to tell the diffie between the two.

Oh, and Miss Trent's new book is just delightful. I do hope she will show us some of the pictures. They are just gorgeous.

Coughing and slightly giddy but still full of the joys is your,

Princess Mushroom
Isabel Trent

Apr 14th, 2005 - 5:48 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

How horrid about the infeccer, sweetheart. But you're still boinging? I must own to being a little jealous -- I didn't really see any mushrooms boinging when you were here in Atlanta and I had so looked forward to it. We had mellow mushrooms* instead, mellow to the point of snoozing adorably in the back of the convertible!

(*We really had no hope of keeping from her the existence of a chain restaurant called the Mellow Mushroom.)
Princess Mushroom

Apr 15th, 2005 - 6:35 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

Well, I think I am boinging in a fairly mellow sort of way. Anf coughing too, which you were lucky to miss!

Wea are today in Clarksdale Mississippi where there are few ordinators and I wtite this standing up in a shop where an assistant has kindly let me use a display model. We passed Oxford yesterday (not Oxford Alabama but Oxford Mississippi - where, just to confuse y'all is a university - not to be confused with Cambtidge University at Harvard. Or is it the other way round?)

Must rusherise now but will see you shortly - very probby from Memphis. Not Memphis of the pharaohs but Memphis of the blue grass. Not that we have seen any yet. It has all been - rather dissapointingly - green.
Miss Drusilla

Apr 15th, 2005 - 7:39 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

What sterling efforts you have made to keep in touch with us, young mushroom. One can only hope you are as assiduous when it comes to writing in the journal I gave you to record your impressions of the United States. I am greatly looking forward to reading it.

Be good, dear, and please accept my best wishes for a prompt change in grass-colour.
Miss B*X

Apr 17th, 2005 - 12:37 AM
Re: Aristasians in America!

My Love and best wishes to my Dear friends.....hoping the ailing mushroom makes a speedy recovery.....when will you be returning to blighty? I am glad you are having a (mostly) marvellous tour. I do miss you though, and look forward to seeing you and hearing more tales on your return.

Your Friend,

Miss B*X
Princess Mushroom

Apr 18th, 2005 - 9:03 PM
Deep in the Heart

Infeccer gets worse and worse, but it will take more than that to damp the shroom-fun.

So sorry for the long silence, but ordinators are far and few like the lands where the Jumblies live.

We went to Memphis and had great fun there, dining off Catfish on the roof aof a building where blues was being played and seeing Elvira Presley herself, who happened to be playing in a bar there. We looked out over the mighty Mississippi, across Mud Island into Arkansas.

We stayed in the most awful motel, having arrived rather late and there, surrounded by strange people who looked as if they had been abusing substances (and one can only feel sorry for the substances) the brunette locked the keys in the car. Well, it had to happen. It is that kind of trip. It all serves to convince me that important inspirations are happening here as the Enemy does not seem to let up.

After a morning of some difficulty (but fun too) the afternoon saw us grossing the Mississippi into Arkansas, eating peanut butter humdingers (a kind of ice-cream) from Dixie Queen. Thoroughtly to be recommended.

We also ate in one of the ubiquitous Waffle Houses. These are on almost every cornet in the South, unlike England where there is only one very large Waffle House known as Parliament. There are other differences too. While the American Waffle House merely commits culinary atrocities, the British one is there to claim responsibility (as they say of terrorist actions) for the acts of the real legislators who live overseas and probably heve never heard about, and certainly do not care about, the three Estates of the British Realm.

Actually, this is a bit unfair. The food at the Waffle House is really rather good if you like frest waffles smothered in maple syrup and whipped butter. Haute Cuisine it ain't, but yummy it am. There was a jukebox, so we played Barabara Anne in honour of two departing friends who made way for my cousin Isabel. Sorry if that sounded like an in-joke. It was.

That night we dined in Little Rock Arkansas and spend most of the next day in - well, let me ask you a riddle: what goes BOING! BOING! PHEW!

Yes you guessed it. Hot Springs.
Princess Mushroom

Apr 18th, 2005 - 9:14 PM
Deep in the Heart

Ooops! Slight ordinatory hiccup.

We are not exactly deep in the heart of Texas, but having travelled about 300 miles from Texarkana to Beaumont, we feel we have seen a little bit of the Lone Star State. And splendid fun it is too. We should be off to Louisiana shortly, having reached the Westernmost point of our journey and preparing to head East round the Gulf of Mexico.

Illeries are starting to overwheml one. One will have to eat or buy a new dress or something.
Isabel Trent

Apr 18th, 2005 - 10:18 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

A new dress is clearly the only solution. I have been coping with the agony of your absence in rather a similar manner -- I've had a dreadful cosmetics binge. Emotional transference, you know, and the need for distractions. I shall have no money for weeks. This is how it happened.

First, I thought: I have a lovely new powder brush (not enormously new, but new enough that it is not yet old), so why not buy some jolly good loose powder to go with it? The brand that suggested itself was, of course, T. LeClerc, founded in Paris in 1881, and off I went to order it.

But really, I said to myself, one's complexion must be at its very best in order to do the powder justice. Why not cheat and buy a foundation primer? I found one at Philosophy that promises to make my skin fearfully smooth and seal in my moisturiser to keep me better hydrated. Obviously, I had to have it, particularly as I had a coupon for a free full-size eye cream and I'm already running out of my current one.

That was all very well. But, darling, do you recall last Monday we were at Neiman Marcus and they had that pretty pinky-golden cream-to-powder Guerlain eyeshadow I'd been hunting for weeks, and the naughty shop wouldn't take any of my credit cards? I never carry cash so was rather in a conundrum, which I solved by fetching some of the green stuff and going back on Saturday for the eyeshadow -- and that sheer coppery-red lipstick into the bargain.

The tragedy was that, of course, the Guerlain counter is next to the Yves Saint Laurent counter. It put... ideas into my head. Naughty luxurious blonde ideas. I went back yesterday to clarify them, and left again with an unimaginably smooth and shiny red lipstick, a steel blue/silver grey eyeshadow duo that suits me magnificently (and besides, Dita Von Teese uses it), and a new Touche Eclat.

A digression is obviously necessary here, just in case there are girls in the club who know not the joys of Touche Eclat. It is simply the world's best concealer. And the closest thing to a universal concealer, too, because there are only three shades and they work for absolutely everybody. I think it has something to do with light-diffusing particles or some such. I don't understand the science. But I do understand the beautiful complexion that results from its application! I have used it before, but couldn't afford another when I ran out and although since then my fortunes have restored themselves somewhat, I couldn't quite justify the expense until I was wracked with misery by the departure of so dear a cousin and needed to be pampered and cheered up at all costs.

I still miss you hideously. But I can't write any more now -- I absotively must paint my face!
Princess Mushroom

Apr 20th, 2005 - 7:14 PM
Way down Yonder

Well, here we are in New Orleans and finally at rest from our travels. We shall stay in our charming hotel here in the French Quarter for three whole nights. The first time we have stopped so long since we were with darling Isabelle.

The royal shroomer has spent much of the intervening time in a bit of a fever and in something of a daze induced partly by fever and partly by some very potent cough medicine plus pseudoephedrine and other medicinals. Gosh if this is what pseudo-ephedrine does one can only wonder about the real thing!

At the insistence of tearaway young brunette, Em, we toured the Bayou Gauche (which is a swamp) in a very fast airboat which glided (or glid) over shallow water and reed banks with elegance grave and extreme whizziness. Blondes had to wear tight headscarves to prevent hairdo ruination. Em held an alligator and posed for a grotophaph and then persuaded me to do the same. And I really did! Em said I was a weed because I did not remove my white gloves, but I explained that a lady never removes her gloves to hold an alligator. Consult any etiquette book.

Last night we strolled by the Mississippee again, several hundred miles downstream from where we crossed it from Tenessee into Arkansas. We also ate alligator.

Raya Novaryana talked of her thoughts on the Culverian Question. One does not have to be in Culveria to consider the question, but it does bring things into focus. Some Culverians (Aristasian Americans) have taken the view that since Altalia (old-world Aristasia) is parallel in some ways to England, Culveria should be parallel to modern America, perhaps even in such matters as republicanism.

Let us just note here (we shall probably talk at length about it later) that America is a revolutionary society, founded on the doctrines of the Revolution of 1776. What is often forgotten is that Britain is also a revolutionary society, founded on the doctrines of the so-called "Glorious Revolution" of 1688. The ideas of the American Revolution are direct descendants of those of the British Revolution, which is why British Whigs supported the American Revolution while American Tories opposed it.

Nothing comparable to either revolution - or to the French revolution which re-shaped Europe - happened or could have happened in Aristasia. The American Revolution tried to re-create the polity of republican Rome (which is why America has a Senate). Now Rome overthrew its monarchy in early times, establishing first an elective republic (essentially an aristocratic government) and then an Empire which soon became what we should call a military dictatorship, with Emperors arising from the Army (or Legions).

The Aristasian equivalent to Rome was Caire which never ceased to be an Empire with a hereditary Empress. Republicanism was unknown as was military rule. For a parallel to the position of the Cairen (and later Aristasian) Empress one should probably look to Japan rather than the West. The Empress is regarded as the descendant of Sai Raya - the Sun - and rules by hereditary right as the incarnation of the Divine Principle.

This idea is different from the governing principles of post-revolutionary Britain as it is of post-revolutionary America. It has a little (but only a little) more in common with the Mediaeval Holy Roman Empire).

The point is that Aristasia is scarcely more parallel to modern Britain than it is to modern America. In terms of currency we use pounds, shillings and pence, which have not been used in Britain for thirty years. We use pounds and ounces; yards, feet and inches; pints and gallons, which are used in America but not in pit-England.

In other words, Aristasia is a world of its own. It is parallel to Telluria, but in subtle ways and it should not be considered that Culverian Aristasia should be parallel to revolutionary, republican America any more than Aristasia in the old world is parallel to the European republics or to the revolutionary British polity which is anterior to both the the American and European revolutions.
Felice Nonchalante

Apr 20th, 2005 - 11:53 PM
Re: The Culverian Question

History may be seen as a series of revolutions, large and small. Modern England is often seen as starting with the accession of the Tudors in 1585, after the overthrow of the Plantagenets, and the Civil War has been called the English Revolution. Local, cultural and social revolutions also abound, such as those in currency and measurement which you mention. But as I understand it, Aristasia is not historical; the provinces, although we associate them with periods of time, are co-existing, static, geographical. Culveria must have its own provinces, each perhaps ÔtwinnedÕ to an Altalian province. I wonder if Culveria in some way imitates Caire, as America did Rome, and has an Empress, with a Governess General in each province, rather than the Queens or Sovereign Princesses of the Altalian provinces. This would resemble the states with their governors; also the local rulers, though not ÔelectedÕ in the Tellurian sense, would certainly be ÔchosenÕ rather than born to their positions. I hope this speculation is not too whimsical. Culveria obviously has its own character, distinct from Altalia.

Apr 21st, 2005 - 8:38 AM
Re: The Culverian Question

In such a case, Imperial Law would be rather like the American Constitution, having primacy over all local laws. It would be much studied, cited and subject to interpretation. There would be a land to the west, mainly unexplored, where the Empress's hand did not reach, and the borders would be like the Wild West of history.
Princess Mushroom

Apr 30th, 2005 - 12:00 AM
Is it True what they Say about Disney?

So here we are, back in the Cockney Raj after a 4,000 mile tour round the Southern states of America. In fact, our journey in America was about as long as our journey to America.

After much catch-upping sleep, one has been enjoying the sunny weather and English countryside.

But I am popping to tell you about Disney. I never quite made it into Disneyland in Paris. I went there once with my former brunette, but it was late and hardly worth buying a day-ticket, so we just moseyed about the outer attractions and went on the pedallos.

I have often wondered about Disney World. Could the magic of Disney be conveyed in flesh and off the screen? And would it not be ruined by the hordes in their Pit-pyjamas?

Well, at other places one manages to ignore Johnny Bongo.One simply de-registers him. After all it is the great axiom when playing in the Pit: the boor ye have always with you.

But yes. The extent to which the Magical Kingdom was able to deploy its beautiful phenomena was, to my rather susceptible mind, beyond belief. and I found myself continually moved to tears of joy and laughter.

It calls itself "The Happiest Celebration on Earth". The nice Florida lady who talked to us about tickets said "It is the last innocent place on earth". It is also the world's greatest tourist attraction. One would have thought Johnny Bongo might have learned something from that. But that would be too much to hope for.

One is astonished by the beauty, the magic, the charm and the wonder. And one is compelled to ask oneself why the hordes who flock to see these lovely things dress themselves like rejects from the laundry-bag. Why this dichotomy between their inner aspirations and their outer baggy drabness? Perhaps we may have time to consider that anon.

But now, as time runs short for me, let me say that Mr. Disney has added something to the image-sphere of the 20th century. So much was lost in that century, but the magical vision of Mr. Disney - unlike anything the world had seen before - was one of the positive and beautiful additions to the image-sphere and influences each one of us daily.

At some time a wiser pen than mine must discuss this fully and philosophically (Raya Novaryana, perchance?) But for now let me say that the Magic Kingdom far surpassed my hopes and expectations and that I feel refreshed in heart and soul by that charming and glorious vision.

Apr 30th, 2005 - 4:06 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

Your time is nearly up, dear Princess? How sinister that sounds. Surely we are not to lose our sweet Royal Fungus to the Grim Reaperette?
Princess Mushroom

Apr 30th, 2005 - 4:21 PM
Re: Aristasians in America!

Pray calm yourself, dearest Diana (charming name - we shall have to have a Princess of that name one of these days). While I may mot it is not yet time to reap.

I was merely referring to the approach of my Royal Bedtime which is rather firmly enforced by certain prefects. Bedtime, it is true does have something of the ineluctibility of the Final End, especially when enforced by the prefectoria.

Nothing is certain but death and smacksies, after all.

Oops sorry! Did I really say that?

Apr 30th, 2005 - 6:18 PM
The Culverian Question

Does all this mean that Aristasians are opposed to the English Revolutions (both 1640 and 1688) as well as the American and French ones? And what about the Tudor "revolution"? Have Aristasians a "position" on all these things, or are they too different from Aristasia for that to be possible?